Battle against bureaucracy, part 378

Just when you thought the battle was over... we have been trying to get Paul a passport so that we can safely travel to Canada this summer. After collecting every piece of evidence that we had to prove Paul's existence, US citizenship and family legality, we trucked ourselves down to the airport post office (the only one with reasonable passport hours) and waited behind all the other fools who put their passport applications off to the last minute (new border rules went into effect June 1). The helpful man behind the counter took what he needed, leaving us with Paul's green card and Korean passport. Both had expired and he assured us they were not required. 5 weeks later we received a letter in the mail stating that further proof of citizenship was required. I called the passport office in Charleston and waited for a ridiculous amount of time before actually reaching a human. I explained our situation and she said she thought all they needed was his green card. She wasn't 100% sure and said someone from the department would call us directly with the answer within three business days. That was Friday. On Thursday the next week I sent in the green card, figuring no one was ever going to actually call me. The following Monday I received a message from the passport office. Hmm... guess "three days" really meant six. She said we also needed to send his passport and the original adoption decree from the court. I told her we sent in the only thing the court gave us and that we were told the passport was expired. Send it anyway she said and sent me a Fed Ex airmail envelope. Two days later I dropped off the passport at Fed Ex and the following day received another phone call requesting the final adoption decree. When I couldn't be reached, they called CJ who also told them that the only paperwork we received on our court day was already in their hands. Not enough he was told. So he called the courthouse and requested that they send us any and all paperwork associated to our case. They required a notarized request accompanied by a photo copy of his driver's license and told him that they may not be able to release it through the mail. Keep in mind that we lived in a different county at the time and picking up the paperwork would require a 4+ hour round trip drive. That is a lot of gas for one piece of paper. And I can only imagine that they will probably just give us another copy of what we already have and have already sent in to the passport office. Sigh. Meanwhile, every time he sees a commercial for Marineland he asks, "Can we go to that zoo?" Someday, buddy. Someday.

Party at the van's!

Pardon the clutter, but I wanted to put a picture of our new deck here for anyone too far away to visit. My darling hubby worked his butt off over Memorial Day weekend - he is apparently making a habit of celebrating the fallen by taking on massive home improvement projects. Last year he installed the kitchen floor, this year the deck. I digress. The deck is HUGE and very awesome. It still needs a railing, so we are careful to keep Paul and any small visitors away from the edge. Paul thinks it's great. He loves helping daddy build it and has only lost a small handful of nails down the cracks.

Thank you B.F. Skinner

I apologize in advance for writing yet another entry about potty training. It simply has been occupying a large chunk of my time/brain power. And frankly I had started to believe that Paul would be showing up to his first day of kindergarten in diapers. Slightly dismayed but determined not to resort to pull-ups, I scoured the internet chat boards for advice. I asked every mom I came into contact with how she did it. I tried desperately to let go of control, knowing that ultimately it was up to Paul. Last week I read an article that suggested feeding your child bran muffins & then leaving them in the bathroom until they produced. Too cruel, even for me. I chose instead to stick with BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION. Translation: BRIBERY. In the form of the sacred CANDY. (Please don't tell my son's doctor or dentist.) The plan is actually two-fold. Thanks to my mentor at school (who provides excellent teaching advice AND parenting advice) and the Easter Bunny, we have set up two dispensers in the bathroom. Pee candy (jelly beans) and Poop candy (chocolate eggs). Yes, I see how gross that must seem. However chocolate is his favorite. You should see the boy unwrap a chocolate egg... as if it were gold. For additional, long-term motivation he has a chart where he earns stickers for staying dry and double stickers for pooping in the potty. A full sticker chart = a trip to the toy store. (Not everything is about rotting his teeth, I had to throw in some materialism too.) Even after all of this carrot dangling and bell-ringing, it took a while to get the boy to decide it was time to get serious. I am happy to say that we are finally moving in the right direction. He occasionally tries to outwit the system and earn extra candy, but overall he is doing very well. We are very proud!

Well hello there Mr. President

We have been teaching Paul to recite his address when asked. He is doing a great job, proudly announcing, "123 My Street" (Obviously I am not going to write our real address on the blog... this is the internet after all.) In the meantime, CJ has been asking him who the president is, mostly because he enjoys hearing Paul say, "OOOOOObama!" Well, I think we may have confused him by teaching the two things too close together. The other day we were driving home and I asked Paul, "Who lives at 123 My Street?"
"Paul!"
"Who else lives there?"
"OOOOObama!"
Huh. Guess that's who has been eating all the ice cream.

A swift kick

Right before Spring Break CJ said to me, "So are you planning on making a to-do list for break? Things like 'send in passport applications' and 'potty train Paul'? And then you can not get them done until, oh this summer?" HA HA HA HA. Yes, my husband is mean. But truly I needed his nasty sarcasm to kick me in the rear and stop my ridiculous procrastinating. Honestly, I've been talking about potty training since the boy turned two. And I picked up the passport applications last summer. Oops. Low and behold - it worked! After being shot-down at the regular post office (we arrived ten minutes after they stop processing passport applications), we took a trip out to the airport post office early Saturday morning and FINALLY TURNED THEM IN!! (I just needed to renew mine, Paul needed a new one). While waiting in line we met a couple with two teenagers who were adopted from Korea. They had used the same agency as we are currently using for #2. Very cool.
As for the potty training, well, we continue to work on it. Paul is wearing underwear and trying to exert his control at every turn. Ugh. I am trying not to get too anxious (a trait I find annoying and utterly unavoidable). I am just happy that I was able to prove my hubby wrong. Oh sure, he probably knew all along that his remark would motivate me and that was his strategy all along, blah blah blah. Sigh.

I hope you weren't planning to eat those

I am happy to report that we are finally enjoying some potty related success. Apparently Paul simply needed a mission. Potty training has been a bit of a bumpy road. He didn't like sitting in his musical potty chair (and I didn't like the fact that it mysteriously serenaded the ghost pee-er in the middle of the night). We tried sitting him on the big toilet, but I worried constantly that his high level of distractibility would land him butt first into the water and create PTTD (post-traumatic toilet disorder). I bought a potty attachment, but he didn't seem too crazy about that either. Then he tried standing, and that resulted in a whole lotta pee in places other than the toilet. Enter the mission. Toss a few Cheerios into the water and voila! Instant challenge. And the boy does enjoy a challenge. Now it isn't, "Do you need to go potty?" followed by a loud chorus of "NOOOOO!!!" It is, "I bet you can't hit the Cheerios!" Works every time.
Now, if anyone has a strategy for the other half of the potty equation, please pass it on. I am resisting the urge to send him into the bathroom with a jar full of raisins, a torture inflicted upon me by my mother.

A week of birthdays

Paul is three. His birthday week began with a celebration at daycare on Tuesday. We made cupcakes the night before, and when Paul woke up Tuesday morning he proudly announced, "Today is my birthday!" The following morning, when it was actually his birthday, he had to be reminded. But he was very excited at the prospect of "two cranes" which is the gift he has been asking for since January. Grandma takes care of Paul on Wednesdays, so I left work at lunchtime and met them at Friendly's. Paul was very excited when the waitresses all came to the table to sing. That night everyone met at Grandma's house for dinner and ice cream cake. The "two cranes" (a Lego construction set) was presented along with a new bike and some other cool gifts. (Pics of Paul on the bike coming soon... my camera was dead on the one nice day we've had so far since!) My favorite part of the day was on our drive home when he said, "Mommy, what a nice day. Grandma turned the lights off and sang happy birthday to me." Seriously, could he be any sweeter? Friday night we began preparing for the big party. Paul enjoyed another opportunity to lick a beater full of cake batter (the boy has a stomach of steel so I am not too worried about salmonella) and proudly displayed his chocolate face for the camera. I am happy to report that my bulldozer cake was a success - despite some icing setbacks.

Saturday... Paul had a great time at his party - he loved having everyone over and being the center of attention. The kids enjoyed themselves and we only had one injury (a bloody lip). They had some trouble busting into my homemade pinata, but luckily Mitch was there to beat it with a 2x4. Seriously. And no, I did not capture that on film - I was trying to make sure no small people got in the way. Once I get all of the pictures organized and labeled, I'll send out a snapfish album.